


get you the moon

by anxietyoun



Category: X1 (Korea Band)
Genre: Adult Content, Angst, Angst and Feels, M/M, Older Man/Younger Man, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-27
Updated: 2019-09-27
Packaged: 2020-10-29 05:50:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,702
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20791670
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anxietyoun/pseuds/anxietyoun
Summary: 'Cause you are, you areThe reason why I'm still hanging on'Cause you are, you areThe reason why my head is still above waterAnd if I could i'd get you the moon I give it to youAnd if I could I'd get you the moonAnd give it to youAnd if death was coming for youI'd give my life for you— get you the moon - Kina (feat. Snow)





	1. Chapter 1

"It's been a while? How are you?"

"Fine."

He smiled. "Ah, really?"

Do I look like I'm fine? No. "Yes."

"Seungwoo! Congrats on you marriage!"

He smiled. That smile. I want that smile only for me. Mine. He's congratulating people for his marriage. Was he really genuinely happy about it? Was he really serious about this? Why did you get married? Why? Hyung... Why?

"Seungyoun-ah!" He called me. I snapped out of my thoughts. 

He gave me a smile but was that even a smile? Hyung, tell me, were you really happy at this situation? Should I... Tell you how I truly feel? About you? Eversince I met you?

"Hyung..." I called him, enough for him to hear me.

"Hmmm?"

Not again with that smile. Please.

"I have something... to tell you..."

"What is it?"

"Meet me at the 2nd floor balcony. Later at 9pm." Where did I found the guts to say that?

"Oh, why?" He tilted his head and gave me a soft expression look.

Fuck it. 

Stop.

"Just.. do as I say.. please.." I bowed down my head to hide the redness of my face. He just gave me an 'okay' and went to the reception after that. I lifted my head up and saw how his back vanish at my sight. I suddenly felt my legs wobbled that caused me down to sit on the floor. What was I thinking?

[ 2nd floor – Balcony ] 

I am constantly checking the time on my watch, biting my lowering lip because of nervousness. I don't know how to start the conversation once he gets here. I don't know how to tell him what I've been wanting to say for the longest time. What if he rejects me? Of course he will you dumbass. What if he—

"Seungyoun-ah?"

That voice. I slowly turned my back and saw him. He looked really handsome on his white suit and pushed back hair. His smile. Please, let it be me the only one to see it.

"What's this for? What were you suppose to tell me?"

I saw him walk slowly as he say his words, hands digged down both his pants pocket. He stopped, leaving a ruler inch between us. Again with that smile. Fucking stop. I'm begging you.

"Congrats.. on your marriage.."

He laughed so loud when I said those words. I bowed down my head because that was so dumb of me.

"Was that it? You could've just said it a while ago haha! But still, thank you. I'm gonna go down now, I need to take care of the guests and my wife's waiting for me downstairs."

He marched down his feet, his back starting to fade on my sight. No. Don't go. Please, don't leave me.

"Hyung..."

He turned his back and gave me a smile. "Hmmm?"

"Are you... Happy?" I lifted my head up and saw how his face changed. I knew it. 

"O-of course I am.. what are you talking about?"

"Are you really happy, hyung?"

"Seungyoun, I told you already that I am ha—"

"HYUNG! I LIKE YOU!" There, I fucking said it. I saw how his face plastered a shocked look.

"S-seungyoun... what–"

"NO! SCRATCH THAT! HYUNG, I LOVE YOU"

We locked eye contact, I know anytime now that my eyes would be filled with tears, I know where this was going...

"When? Since, when?"

"Eversince my junior days until now that I am in my senior years.." I can't clearly distinguish what his reaction was because his head was down. 

"I see.. I don't know what.. to say actually.. but you know that it's impossible right? Both men, in a relationship, you know that?" He lifted his head and gave me a faint smile.

I don't know what to say anymore, he turned his back on me and started to leave. He left me. I sat down the floor and tears started to fall down my face. That shit hurts. Fuck this feeling. I lifted my head up to stop the tears from streaming but then I saw the moon. It reminded me of him. Why? Why did I suddenly thought of you because of the moon? Hyung, tell me... It hurts, hyung, it... hurts...


	2. why does it have to be you?

𝘼𝙛𝙩𝙚𝙧 4 𝙮𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙨...

"Seungyoun! Are you going to the study group later?"

"Pass! I need to rush some deadlines later!"

"Okay! We'll just send you the softcopy of handouts via e-mail after!"

I thanked my classmate and he quickly went off for the group study session. I looked at the window and it's quite sunny, the weather's looking great. I grabbed my bag and went out of the classroom to head somewhere. I'm already at my 4th year in college and things were going smooth for me. I'm making myself occupied as much as I can to not think much of what happened—ah! Nevermind.

"Ah! I'm already here!"

After school hours, I sometime go to this Art Class to kill some time, I just need to pay for the hours I'll be spending. I didn't bother to take permanent class since it'll have conflict with my schedules.

"Oh! Seungyoun, you're here?"

I looked to whom said it and it was Ms. Sunhwa, "Ah, yes, I'm here hehe" I looked around the class and there's a few that's doing their business. The woody smell of the room, the rustles of the brushes inside the can being picked up, the brushes being stroked on the canvas, these stuffs relaxes me when school stressed me out.

"You can take your seat, the brushes are already beside the stool, you can start anytime you want."

I just gave her a nod and smile. I placed my bag inside the locker room and wear the apron. As soon as I was abput to take a seat, Ms. Sunhwa called me. I walked towards her and asked her why'd she called me.

"Since you're the student I'm close with, I'll only say this to you first."

Sudden curiosity hit me, "What is it?"

"I'll be handing this studio to my brother, since I need to settle things with my husband who's based in Australia right now."

"Ah.. then what does it have to do with me?"

"I'm telling you this because you might find me so I'm giving you a heads up hehe"

"Ah.. that.. I used to find you when I need help regarding my work, I guess I need to let things on my own now."

She laughed. "You can always ask help from my brother though? He'll help you all with your worries in art, don't worry."

I just gave her a faint smile, "Can I... go to my area now?"

"OMG! Yes you can now haha!"

I bowed and headed to my area, I looked at the blank canvas, my mind suddenly went blank. I was sure that I already have an idea on what to draw, but I don't know what happened.

"Ah, hello? Who's this?"

I looked at my back and I saw Ms. Sunhwa having a talk through her phone. I now faced the blank canvas and as soon as I was about to pick up a paint brush, my hand stopped mid-halfway. I froze. Did I heard her right? She's talking to...

"Oh? Seungwoo-yah! How are you?"

"Seung.. Woo.. Hyung?" I whispered in between breathes. I closed my hand to form a fist. I know that there's so many man out there that named Seungwoo, but why does the one she's talking to right now gave me the chills?! WHY?!

"Are you coming today at the studio? Really? Please come so that you can see my students. You're at? For real? Wait for me, I'll come pick you up there. Stay right where you are!"

He's coming.

I just realized that Ms. Sunhwa was already gone to pick him up. I still haven't moved an inch. Countless drops of sweat suddenly dripped down, my breathings became heavy, feels like I'm suffocating.

"I need to get out of here..." The only words I muttered in between my heavy breathes.

I hurriedly pick up my stuffs inside the locker room. As soon as I was about to reach the exit of the room, again, I froze. My eyes can't believe what's infront of me. It's him. It's really him.

"Cho.. Seungyoun?"

I almost fell off my feet. We're locking eyes, both shocked but he looks good in black turtle neck and white pants, hair down while holding his beige coat. "Hyung.."

"What... are you doing here?"

Instead of answering his question, I walked pass by him and to my suprise, he reached out and now he's holding my left wrist, no choice, I looked back.

"Answer me..." He said with full of desparation. I looked at his hand, there's no ring on his finger? Why? I looked at him and his expression... why does he looked like he's so desparate for me to answer his stupid question?

"Why are you he—"

"Seungwoo?"

I looked to whom called him and it's Ms. Sunhwa, I aggressively shoved his hand away and I quickly ran outside. When I got out of the studio, that's when I felt like I've breathed nicely, I don't know for how long I've held my breath when I saw him. Why didn't I knew about this? Why didn't I knew that hyung has a sister?

"Hyung... It really is you, huh?" I looked back at the studio and quickly walked off before he decides to come out. I thought I've already moved on from him? But why all of a sudden... my feelings betrayed me? Why? Of all situation?

Suddenly my kakaotalk ringed a message, it's from Ms. Sunhwa

👤 Seungyoun? Perhaps, do you know my brother? Personally?

I ignored her message and started to walk my way to my house. My mind was so clouded. I can't think straight. My kakaotalk ringed another message. I checked and it's from my classmate. I threw my phone at my bed and sat down the floor.

"Why of all people... why does it have to be him?"

once again, my kakaotalk ringed another message. I grabbed my phone and checked who it was. You've got to be fucking kidding me?

"Seungwoo-hyung.."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> once a week update, or not? I posted Chapter 1 so that I won't be bothered by my mind haha

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! I'll TRY to update once a week and this'll not exceed 20 chapters.


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